Are You Socially Inept On Social Media?

Social media offers you a platform to interact and connect with people, whether they be friends, family, work colleagues or even strangers. But have you ever wondered what sort of social networker you are? Do you pride yourself on being well connected and understanding what is acceptable or not? Do you think about what other users think of your online antics? Do you plough ahead regardless of what others may think? Do you even think?! This blog looks at some core examples as to why you may be socially inept on social media and how not to deal with certain situations.

Twitter

Twitter is a unique platform in that you can connect one way. It’s OK to not be followed back or be removed, Twitter is an ever changing feed and people fall in and out of favour. Just because you follow someone, doesn’t mean they will or will even want to return the favour. This is where problems arise.

  • If you realise that a follow is unreciprocated, don’t kick up a fuss or take it personally. The worst thing you can do is tweet that person and mention it. This makes you look petty and needy for attention and followers. Remember, not only will that individual see the tweet and judge you, as will the rest of the people who’s feed you incorporate. I’ve seen it with friends, work colleagues and even strangers who may well be new to Twitter and not understand that that’s not how it works. To bring attention to not being followed back is poor form, it’s not the end of the world and you don’t want to risk looking pathetic!

Facebook

  • Constant “Liking” on certain peoples feeds will drive them – and probably their other connections – insane. It’s ok to like the occasional post, sometimes they deserve a quick click on the Like button in appreciation, but to do it on all, or the vast majority of posts, is ridiculous and will do you no favours. It can make you come across as unaware of what is acceptable and overly enthusiastic to interact.
  • This also applies to inappropriate  and overzealous commenting on profiles and posts. I have seen people comment repeatedly on certain peoples feeds and posts, offering nothing to the conversation or it is just not relevant. If you notice that a Facebook user repeatedly replies to other comments or even just acknowledges them with Likes, but doesn’t bother with yours at all, take the hint! You have been considered unworthy of response, probably even irritating. Continued spamming with  commenting and Liking can result in being put on a restrictive list of even blocked and unfriended. Both overzealous Liking and commenting makes you look like you are attention seeking and shouting, “I’m here, look, I’m part of this, don’t leave me out, I’m cool…!”. It’s not a reputation you want and you wont keep your friends by doing it.

General Things To Be Aware Of

  • If you realise someone has removed you from a network, ignore it. Ranting and raving about it isn’t going to make them change your mind about putting you back. You’ve been removed for a reason. They have chosen to take you off rather than restrict you. Reflect on the reasons for that. Bemoaning about loss of Facebook friends or Twitter followers will only wind up others, because rest assured, no one else will care. It may well be this needy, over involvement and social ineptitude which got you removed in the first place.
  • Attempting to follow or connect with people who have displayed no interest in returning it or even deny your requests, is needy and hugely irritating. If they have removed you from other social media platforms, don’t waste your time thinking, “I’ll just follow them on this one instead!”. It makes you come across as clueless and, you got it, incredibly socially inept. If someone doesn’t want to connect with you, it’s really not a big deal, give up trying.
  • Other than Facebook spam comments and Likes, too much general Tweeting, Pinning, G+’ing will also make people bored of you. Knowing how to use social media sparingly, yet effectively, is key.
  • Removing people from networks can impact your day to day life. If you have someone you don’t like, but need them to think you do, hide them from your feed and restrict what they see from you. Reserve removal for people you haven’t spoken to in years and have no desire to rectify this, or people you don’t like but it wont matter if you take them off. But only do it when it suits you to do so, removing people when you may need them to think you still like them wont work out well. Only do it once you wont loose out on anything. You have to be cunning in your need to keep them around. This is when knowing when to hide and when to remove is what makes you socially aware, not stupid.
  • Make sure you are careful about what you put in your bios. Saying too much can make you come across as full on. Saying nothing however, doesn’t invite incentive to connect. Say something arrogant or self righteous can just put people off.

Conclusion

Falling into one of these traps now and then is ok as long as you learn from it. Doing all of them regularly however, will give you an awful online reputation and if you know these people in person, could make them dislike you in general!

~ Image Source Twitter bird: http://www.flickr.com/photos/fanieart

~ Facebook Like: http://www.flickr.com/photos/iluvcocacola

~ Access: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mor10/5422941981

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